The level of shoddiness that went down this weekend is enough to cover us for the next few years. The miss world Kenya event took place at Westlands from around 8pm till I left. The beautiful set up had all the glitz and glamour that a major event should. The rooftop venue was as a complete win for the audience unless you are skimpily dressed. The photographers would usher you in like a Kardashian and take multiple pictures thereafter you’d be offered wine to taste.
The outside area was fitted with two screens and several high tables covered in black. The floor lighting was definitely over the top. Inside the tent, there were multiple chairs with tags. Like every other event, there was the VIP section and the regular was all the way at the back. We proceeded to secure our places right next to Miss Africa; she was absolutely stunning, a true African queen.
When the judges started streaming in , I was caught off guard seeing the CEO of Ashely’s sitting next to that guy from Busia(I forget his name). How does the organizer of the event be part and parcel of the judges? They could have even brought on Sheila Mwanyigah or even Akothee.
Oga Obinna(MC) went on to throw shade on the men who came in with their spouses and spices. He always has a way of keeping the crowd interested and lively. His vivacious nature made the spectators relaxed and entertained all through the night. He probably should have contested. So who can contest? Any man can as long as you are not married or have children. Who can’t win? You and your potbelly.
The 22 aspirants were breathtaking with Ashley’s being their source of style and hair. Seeing my friend embrace the whole concept of what an African woman is; was definitely a moment of pride; the short hair, her big behind, her dark skin color, the white teeth following a maize arrangement and the gracefulness that every woman of color would awe at. The rest of the contestants wore weaves from the woman who was the judge as well. Questionable?
When the talent segment drew, the male models danced, others narrated their speech, one sang tupac (black forest was his name) whereas the female contestants sang Beyonce’s song, acted the skits and the Indian girl skipped all over the stage. Her performance was overbearingly jumpy; call me crazy but I don’t regard skipping all over stage while smiling as dancing.
The worst bit was when she took a shield designed with the center piece from our flag plus a spear. Dressed like a belly dancer, looking like a Miss India’s knock off version, she had the audacity to insult my heritage after all that skipping. That ‘Jambo Kenya’ smile she wore threw me off so bad, my soul landed somewhere at the bottom of the building.
Her Cardi B yellow skirt and boob top were a complete misguide since there was no belly dancing involved. Now that I think about it, it has come to my attention that she was emulating the Masai cultural dance.
Time came when the judges had to make the cut and we were sure that there was no way the Indian could make it. But boy, were we wrong. Over all the other black queens, they opted for the white one. The judges were so white washed with the queen of head bobbing that they completely disregarded the actual title of the whole event.
The Q and A part of the night was next but by that time interests had already dropped. Part of the audience had checked out, others were outside sampling wine and getting fresh air. Soon after the section was done, it was time for the winners to be announced.
The tense air, the silence so deep you’d hear heartbeats sounding like drums in West Africa and the judges reigning in this moment. The top 3 were selected from the male and the female side.
Two African queens and guess who else? Varshita. The men were definitely dashing and completely breathtaking. As expected no light skin boy was going to win the title as I had predicted, the crown went to one Robert Budi aka black forest.
The man was fine; the man definitely deserved the win; the dark skin tone looking like njahi with that perfect smile; his extensive beard reaching his chest almost kissing his navel and that broad shoulder that every woman wanted to swing on left all the men jealous. He was the perfect package of an African man, however I felt that he was slightly short.
It was now time to deselect the ladies who didn’t make it; the dark skinned African model that we thought would be perfect for the title was made to be the second runner up. Varshita and another model who was Congolese went head to head.
At this point, the audience was shook and couldn’t settle down due to the discrepancies. The judge from Busia (Burale) then handed the 500,000 cheque to the Indian girl. All of our hearts sank so deep and so did the money we paid to attend the event.
Madam Terry Mungai rushed to the stage as if it was a proud moment that the title went to someone who doesn’t look African and kept telling people Jambo, honey it is ‘mambo’ nowadays. The normal photo session went on for a straight 30 minutes. The long hair, skinny figured, fake smile, long necked girl is to represent us at an international level.
Out of 42 tribes, Ashley’s could not find a black woman to represent us; we are so ugly and beneath ‘international standards’ that they would rather bring in a girl from Parklands to represent Kenya. Obinna was so startled by the result but like a professional he had to disguise his reaction.
Previously, the winner of miss world Kenya would be given a cheque of a million shillings, a car and free service at Ashley’s for the whole year. This time it was cut by half and no car was issued. The 2nd runner up was given 25,000 Kenya shillings and the 1st runner up was given 50,000 Kenya shillings. All of these were dummy cheques of course due to ‘odi’ reasons.
If you see a white woman representing us during the miss world event, please just know that she is ours. The message I got from this event was that Kenya’s corruption is so ingrained that we’d rather kill our own and make money than to do what is proper. Or perhaps some of us are still so whitewashed that we would always regard a fairer skin tone supreme to our own.
To all the little girls aspiring to bag the title, please do not be lied to that your kinky hair or your dark skin tone is not enough; don’t let the discrepancies of these old folks take away your confidence and leave you feeling less.
To the contestant who went for the title 5 times and never won, please baby girl, it’s not your fault; you are simply not rich enough. To all the men, please uplift your women , let them know that there is nothing wrong with being a size 16, there is nothing wrong with having a dark skin tone, there is nothing wrong with standing 5 inches from the ground, that it is okay to be who you are. A true African woman is well endowed, we are dark, we have kinky hair and we are real.
Congratulations to the Parkland’s girl, you can be the queen of Ashley’s but not our miss world Kenya.