“We are all feminists”. Deep down.
I know men will have a voice in their head going ‘blablabla’ and then pick up watching football. As if watching a bunch of grown men hitting rubber on carpeted grass is vital. The same men who frowned upon the idea of wearing shorts in high school are now ogling at the screen.
Women will nod to this statement because they are women. And it feels nice being part of something.
Half don’t even resonate with it because you will hear them saying ‘ni mwanaume’ and the other half will believe silently. Shaking their heads ever so often upon witnessing the acts going against the current.
Perhaps not fully conversant with what the term means. But still hold on to the title regardless. Others don’t want to be associated with the term because they are afraid that men won’t find them attractive or will not get married. As if marriage is a trophy- as if it is a measure of happiness and a Proverb 31 woman.
Feminism has such a broad spectrum that giving it one definition will restrict its value and its impact. Many think it’s used to shun our counterparts- men.
It evokes a certain aura of competition between a man and a woman. It is used to replace their masculinity. It’s a chance for women to triumph where men have dominated and eradicate their value; in such a way that their opinion and ideas are considered null and trash (what they’ve been doing to us for eons).
Feminism has been branded as an act of rebellion against the male child. It has morphed into something so callous, so despicable that men would rather go against it (having very mediocre knowledge) than support a cause that will ensure their daughters, sisters, mothers, aunts, nieces and wives have a fair share of the pie.
We have been led to believe that some jobs and actions are reserved for the male counterparts. I blame our parents for continuing this false claim but I take on the blame for actually believing. We were led to believe that only a man can be an engineer or a mechanic.
We were coerced by our teachers that it’s okay for a female student to excel in languages and boys to fail at them. We’ve been raised to have men as conductors but not females. It was inappropriate for a woman to sit at the bar but for men it was more acceptable because ‘ni mwanaume’.
Our generation is living proof of the purge. We are at a stalemate. We have always had more women than men in the entire world. That’s why the percentage of lesbians and co-wives is at a soaring high.
We are many in numbers but it doesn’t reflect when we revise the positions because we still have a generation that believes that women should only operate within a four wall parameter.
I always say the higher you go up the chain, the less number of women. The menace is so well spread that despite being 52%of the population we have more male directors, business moguls, commissioners and members of parliaments.
Given our population advantage by this point in time, we should have already had two thirds women members of parliament and even a female president. (Man do not pick up that remote!)
But we can’t because somewhere in our mind we are still apish. There is nothing wrong with having a male president but look at our economy, look at the youth without employment, look at the silly rants and raves from male politicians, have you met Sonko with kiwi on his head? Uhuru employing people from the nursing home?
Our government is full of men with no vision and they would rather squander all the country’s wealth instead of building proper houses, better roads, augment our market values, renovate schools and engage in meaningful conversations.
In records we have the highest corruption cases in Africa. Yes Waiguru was amongst them but do you know why her case was publicized more than NCPB 1.9 billion maize scandal; The Afya house 5 billion scandal; The Galena and Mwea irrigation scheme 3.5 billion scandal; The Evans Kidero 2.7 billion scandal? Let’s not forget Kamlesh Pattni’s 100 billion….…
I would go on but my point couldn’t be more home (literally) We have 90% of our government filled with thieves, is it a coincidence that they are all of male decent?
I have no problem with men, I love men (let’s say a man, to be very politically correct) but we are stuck in a time stamp in which they are reaping us apart. Women and children are simply collateral damage.
Having men in leadership positions is probably not the answer, women might do damage but I’d bet on a female any day any time. We need more chances and we need them now.
The society has put so much pressure on men when it comes to having monetary value. We have taught men that having money makes you more masculine and forgot to teach them that values are more important.
Men at this point in time are more morally bankrupt than any other time in history. They have resided to self serving needs and desires just to prove their masculinity.
This is why they are intimidated by women who make more money than them. They cower when confronted by a woman who isn’t afraid to make decisions or take charge.
Masculinity is being threatened only because men still define themselves along the same line their forefathers did instead of taking up new stance-like women.
‘Men shouldn’t cry nonsense’, ‘men should pay for everything’ (jowie lakini), ‘men should be tall’, ‘men are allowed to cheat’,‘men should be strong’, ‘men should make more money’ and ‘men should batter their girlfriends and wives’.
Feminism is for both men and women but we have been tricked into thinking that it’s reserved for a specified demographic. First of all if a man is challenged by the belief you have in yourself, that man isn’t for you sis. And double check if he wears bras.
Any man whose masculinity is so delicate that a woman with more money or power intimidates him, should move out of his mother’s house. Not just physically but emotionally, mentally and spiritually.
Feminism is an ideology barricaded with truth, equality and equity. We however fail ourselves by participating in mal practices. Wife battery, rape and SGBV (Sexual Gender based Violence) is still being carried on in our homes. Fear? Or maybe shame? Because we taught our girls to be safe but we never taught our boys not to be violent.
We have countless women in marriages that killed their spirit and a generation of kids growing up in bitterness because a woman somewhere resigned to stay in an abusive relationship.
Why? She wasn’t economically stable or was afraid of being blamed for her failed marriage. We never live our true lives because we are designated to think that perfection exists. All a façade- hiding behind society’s expectations while sacrificing our souls.
Chauvinism doesn’t inhibit growth of a woman. It eradicates the growth of a nation. Men believing that they are God has led us to stagnate in our lives morally, spiritually and economically.
Who even said God is a man? The Bible whose sole writers and characters were men? (Story for another day) Chauvinism buried women alive and now we have a bunch of zombies who are filled with echoes of chauvinism in their head thinking they are right.
Women who will side with a man with no questions asked just because he wears pants. Women who would bash a rape victim, throw derogative words to a battered wife, shame a barren woman, seize a married husband (HIV positive) just because she has been hypnotized to thinking that a man should be given reverence.
Remember there is nothing wrong with being married, having kids and honoring your husband. But you’ll be dammed if you honor a man who undermines your worth simply because of a penile structure.
A man who would keep ten backups, you as the main app and somehow convince you that he loves you. A man who doesn’t think twice playing Muhammed Ali with your face.
A man who has no regard for your emotional wellbeing and tears you bit by bit that you forget the royalty in you. Your Highness, sacrifice everything in the world but not your happiness. Especially if he is an Otile Brown.
Feminism just like communism or liberalism is just an ideology. It isn’t specified for a particular group nor is it restricted to those who wear skirts-drag queen or not. You would associate feminism with women yet it’s an ideology that supports the society at large.